Yesterday afternoon a home repairman came to work on some things at our home. When it comes to technical stuff, it is beyond my capacity. Obviously that is self-evident or I wouldn’t have been talking to a repairman. The young man seemed very knowledgeable about his work. I was impressed. Out of curiosity, I asked, “How did you learn to do this stuff?” I added, “I’d never be able to develop your kind of skill set.” He downplayed the level of skill needed, but added he really likes to take things apart and see how they work. He finds it a challenge and a source of satisfaction.
He then asked, “What kind of work do you do?” My first impulse was to tell him I was a writer. That is really a different twist to how I’ve ever responded to that question before. Had I told him that, would I have misrepresented the truth? Okay, I get it. It would have been questionable. You’ll probably be pleased to know I told him the truth, but maybe the day will eventually come that I can say that with accuracy. My cousin Shirley thinks I’m on the road to success as a writer. She likes what I write and she’s convinced I’m on the threshold of making money. Embarrassingly, my last dividend check from the publisher was a little over $4. At that rate, I’ll have to forgo living high on the hog.
In talking to the young man while he worked, I mentioned that I write a daily blog. He responded by asking what I write about. He then said, “Someday, I hope to write a book. I think I’d enjoy writing a blog as well.” He said he has some really interesting stories he’d like to share. He said, “Life has a way of being better than what you might anticipate based on a snapshot at any given point in time. I’ve found it always works out favorably. People need to learn to be positive”.
I liked his style and I liked his bent on life. I asked, “Can you give me an example?” He said, “Sure, I can give you lots of examples”. He went on to tell the story about an episode he and his older brother experienced. He was only twenty-years-old at the time. His brother was two years older than that. For a family holiday, the extended family had met at a lake cabin belonging to his grandparents. He said, “Don’t think badly of me, but you need to know my family has the capacity to put the “C” in conservative. They are rigid in their thinking and relentless in their belief that everyone should think exactly the way they think. My brother and I both had been away to different colleges. We wanted time to visit and an opportunity to listen to music. It was late at night, so we went for a drive in the car.
At some point, their car was pulled over by a police officer. Reportedly, there had been a complaint of loud music. He said, “It wasn’t us, but my brother was pulled over.” As they were waiting for the officer to approach the car, the older brother looked at his younger brother and said: “We’ve got a problem. I’ve got a small amount of marijuana in the car.” The younger brother was horrified. He was shocked that his brother had marijuana in the first place and he was appropriately horrified at what was happening. No doubt, they both were going to jail.
The older brother protectively got out of the car to meet the officer toward the back of the vehicle. They say confession is good for the soul. After a very lengthy conversation, the older brother eventually acknowledged that he had marijuana in his possession, but that his brother didn’t know anything about it. The younger brother, sitting in the front seat watching his brother and the officer through the rearview mirror was in a state of panic. This wasn’t going to end well.
When he saw the officer put handcuffs on his brother, he was sure their goose was cooked. The younger brother had not been drinking and seemed as pure as the driven snow. Consequently, as the older brother was taken away in the police car, it was his lot in life to drive the car back and break the news to the family.
Actually, by the time he got back to the lake house, it was 4:00 a.m. There were more than a dozen extended family members and/or friends staying in the lake house. Maybe because of their conservative nature, they were not night owls. Everyone was sleeping soundly when he returned.
He awakened his parents and said he needed to talk to them. They asked, “Can’t this wait until morning?” He said, “No, you need to know now.” He then shared that his brother had been arrested. His parents wanted to know why and he responded, “I don’t know. The officer allowed me to drive the car back here.”
The young man looked at me and said, “At this point in the story, you know things aren’t going to turn out well. In addition, knowing that one of us was arrested wasn’t going to set well with my grandparents. This was the beginning of my worst nightmare.”
He said, “You may not believe it, but it turned out okay. By the time the officer got him to jail, my brother had talked his way out of anything serious. The charge was going to be driving a car with an expired registration.
He said, “Of course, I didn’t know that until later. Later that morning, I had to drive the friend who’d come from another state with my brother back to Dallas to catch a plane. It was a four hour drive and the only person my brother’s friend knew in the group was my brother. It was awkward. It was really awkward!”
He said, “To this day, my grandparents still want the officer who arrested my brother fired. Who ever heard of arresting someone for an expired registration! Interesting story? “Right!” I asked the repairman if he’d mind if I shared his story in my blog. He said he’d be happy for me to chronicle his experience.
We subsequently talked about his ability to craft a story. I encouraged him to begin writing them down. He assured me that he really wanted to write. I honestly told him, if I could write, anyone could write. He was really ahead of his game.
About forty minutes after the repairperson left, he gave me a call. He said, “I need to tell you the rest of the story. Hopefully, you won’t think badly of me.” He went on to say: “As I was driving to your house for the service call, I was thinking about my dad. He once told me, ‘I was always thinking’. It was a compliment that I’ve remembered all these years”. The repairperson then said, “I don’t know, maybe it was because you were so complimentary of my work and of my potential to write, but I left your house feeling better about myself than I’ve ever felt after a service call. Your compliments made me feel good. I wanted to call and thank you for that”.
He added, “I also need to tell you the part of the story I left out. While I was watching my brother and the officer through the window by looking in the rear view mirror, I reached into the console between the seats and took out the bag with the marijuana in it. I had never seen marijuana before, but it’s threat motivated me to take action. I ate the marijuana while they were talking. The officer searched the car for over an hour and couldn’t find any trace of marijuana. All he found was an empty bag”. That’s the real reason they didn’t keep my brother in jail.
The repairman was right. Things don’t always end as disastrously as we sometimes fear. Secondly, whenever we opt to provide genuine compliments for skills and ability, people value and appreciate the kindness. It is a source of encouragement. Don’t we all need heavy doses of that?
All My Best!
Don