Last night the General and I visited briefly with my daughter and son-in-law. They are headed out this morning to New Orleans via SWA. They are traveling for a work related meeting that will absorb most of their week, but I suspect they’ll manage to find the time to mix pleasure with business. After all, Andrea is her father’s daughter. In addition, Kevin grew up in New Orleans so it’s like going home for him.
Following the week in New Orleans, they travel Friday to Washington, D.C. for the annual Marine Corps Marathon. Actually, I’m torn that I can’t be with them. I know my way around D.C. pretty well and I would make a great tour guide. On the other hand, can you imagine the crowd in Washington D.C. next weekend? The marathon is on Sunday and it will draw quite a crowd even though the number of runners is capped. According to the publicity I found: “ The event field of 30,000 is composed of runners from all 50 states, the District of Columbia, and more than 50 countries. Known as "The People's Marathon," the MCM is open to all runners ages 14 and above and is the largest marathon that does not offer prize money.
Last night Andrea was lamenting the fact that they will be away from Colby and Samson for nine days. I started to write: “..away from their two dogs”, but thought better of it. Colby is the oldest and the slowest of the two labs. I’d also add the most well-behaved if you consider jumping up on people and ignoring boundaries misbehavior. Personally, I do, but my daughter probably sees it differently. She thinks the younger of the two labs can do no wrong.
Gram was providing doggie daycare for the two critters (I mean grand-dogs) earlier in the week. Unfortunately a repairman who’d come to service our water well knocked on the door between the inside of our garage and our house. Despite my instructions for the younger dog to “stay” as I opened the door, he was past me in a flash. I definitely remember the startled look on the repairman’s face as he backed waaaaay back.
I managed to grab his collar (the dogs – not the repairman’s) as he made his way past me through the door. It was an awkwardly embarrassing moment. Actually, several embarrassing moments more accurately describes the scenerio. For starters, the man had no idea that the dog is harmless unless you consider an unintentional injury to whoever is foolish enough to hang on to his collar. Trust me, it added a whole new dimension to dirty dancing. For starters, the dog was intent on leading. As you might suspect, he drug me all over the dance floor (garage I mean). For a good fifteen to twenty seconds he and I did the watusi (or was it the cotton eyed Joe)? All I know is that it was fast moving and I was absolutely not in control.
So as we bid farewell last night, my daughter said: “Dad – Remember that Colby is going to need a kiss on the top of her head each night”. Just for the record, that’s not going to happen. How far can you bend without breaking? I’m not going to play smoochie poochie with Colby. I may be nuts, but I’m not stark raving mad.
I’ve been piecing word pictures together for years, but I’m not sure I’ve ever used the phrase: “Stark raving mad”. I looked it up to find that it means “completely crazy” – synonyms: completely, totally, utterly, absolutely, downright, dead, entirely, wholly, fully, quite, altogether, thoroughly, truly…” Color that anyway you want, but it doesn’t leave any element of doubt that it means totally crazy.
Leo Buscaglia said that: “If you act crazy consistently you can get by with anything; otherwise they call the cops. When you stop to think about it, that is almost like a “get out of jail free” card, but I’m not kissing a dog. I’m not going to talk “baby talk” to a dog either.
Out of fear that someone will mistaken me for an Archie Bunker lookalike, I probably shouldn’t say that a dog’s place is outdoors rather than in-doors. The expression “dog house” has to come from somewhere. When I was a kid and we had a dog, inside the house was “off limits”. Ours was an outside dog and the dog had a dog house. You can ask my little brother (oops – younger brother). He will tell you that dogs belong outside.
If you think I lead a dog’s life, you should see Larry. He has two inside dogs at his house. Trust me, it wasn’t his idea. I also predict that he didn’t get a vote in the matter.
The world has gone nuts; maybe even stark raving mad. Dogs regardless of their size stay indoors in today’s mixed up world. No one needs a dog house anymore unless they write a blog and suggest that dogs should be outside. In that case, the dog house would be for the writer of the blog.
They say a “man’s home is his castle”. Trust me, while the two labs are with us, I will think I’m royalty. Colby and Samson will sit at my feet. They will follow when I go to another room and once again re-establish their positions by sitting at my feet.
Even the General will change her persona while they are with us. Are you ready for this: She talks “baby talk” to the dogs. I’m not complaining. I’d rather she do that than bark orders. Long story short – I’m not playing smoochie poochie.
All My Best!
Don